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When a person (male or female) realizes that only they themselves can be responsible for their emotions, actions, and reactions…

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Unfortunately, it’s a false sense of well-being and is entirely dependent on the actions of others (thus the inevitable crippling neediness).

For men and women, growth in relationship is in direct proportion to one’s sense of emotional responsibility.

Move on immediately, you’ll save yourself a whole lot of time and heartache.” MORE: Ask a Guy: How Can I Avoid Being the Rebound?

A guy once told me that, “A man is devastated at the end of a relationship to the extent to which he sold himself out.” What does it mean for a guy to sell himself out (in the context of a relationship)?

Maybe he changes his lifestyle, stops hanging out with certain friends, or changes his habits.

It seems innocent enough, but over time the guy begins to starve for whatever it was he got from the things he gave up.

I’ve heard things like “When a guy’s relationship ends, he replaces her.

When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns,” or “He’s just hooking up with such-and-such to spite the ex-girlfriend,” or “Guys just don’t care” and other nonsense.

For people that haven’t yet fully realized that all of us need to be emotionally responsible (which is most people), this is where much of the pain of the breakup originates from (they blame themselves for not “measuring up”…

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