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It is not a question of being stingy, however; it is about equality.
“I advise men to pay on a first date,” says ‘flirt coach’ Thomas Peter, who runs how-to courses in flirting in Zurich or by telephone or email.
Swiss people may not be keen on making an effort when they know you are likely to move on in the near future, explains Tijmens.
She says: “Labelling yourself as an expat when you want to date locals is not always helpful.
Women should make themselves more approachable by, for example, smiling and saying ‘hello’. It doesn’t pay off to label yourself an ‘expat’ Think being an expat will make you sound exotic? There are around two million expats in Switzerland from all over the world, but the Swiss are on their home turf: they have friendships they established as children, making it hard for foreigners to build relationships with them.
“This gives the man the green light to speak to you. Exacerbating the problem is the temporal nature of expats.
“She would suggest meeting up only every two weeks, even though we didn’t live far from each other,” he says.
“I had to offer full commitment, but be prepared to have and offer a lot of independence too.” …so be clear when dating several people simultaneously While dating a few people at the same time is common in some countries, particularly America, it is not customary in Switzerland.
“If you would like to find a nice partner, then I suggest you date long enough to see whether your date has the qualities that you need in order to be fulfilled in a long-term relationship before you become intimate.” Flirt coach Peter agrees, saying that as long as both parties are happy, there is no Swiss-specific rule about whether you sleep together on the first date or after 20.
*names have been changed A version of this article was published in 2016.
Just say, you live here now.” Sharing the cost of a date is normal If elsewhere men pay on dates, this is not always the case in Switzerland.
Alice*, a French expat in Zurich, reveals that although her Swiss boyfriend paid on their first date, he expected costs to be split 50/50 after that.
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