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As recently as my own adolescence, gay marriage was a distant aspiration, something newspapers still put in scare quotes.

Now, it’s been enshrined in law by the Supreme Court.

None of this fits the narrative I have been told, the one I have told myself.

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In a survey of care-providers at HIV clinics, one respondent told researchers: “It’s not a question of them not knowing how to save their lives.

It’s a question of them knowing if their lives are worth saving.” I’m not going to pretend to be objective about any of this.

Still, even as we celebrate the scale and speed of this change, the rates of depression, loneliness and substance abuse in the gay community remain stuck in the same place they’ve been for decades.

Gay people are now, depending on the study, between 2 and 10 times more likely than straight people to take their own lives.

There’s Malcolm, who barely leaves the house except for work because his anxiety is so bad.

There’s Jared, whose depression and body dysmorphia have steadily shrunk his social life down to me, the gym and Internet hookups.

“The drugs were a combination of boredom and loneliness,” he says.

“I used to come home from work exhausted on a Friday night and it’s like, ‘Now what?

Until a few weeks ago, I had no idea he used anything heavier than martinis.

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